Two Versus Three Versus Four
by The Rainbow Monocerus
Summary: A competition which entails a five-star beach resort prize will test the VSSE's finest. Friendships will be strained, alliances made, and sanities broken. Who will emerge the victor? Robert, Wesley, or Giorgio? Rated for violence and language. Hinted EvanGio.
1. Mission Prelude

**Mission Prelude**

* * *

"It's an interesting idea…but I don't see it being popular with any of my teams." The VSSE Director replied to the reputable psychologist sitting across from him. The neat, mousy woman seated across him normally dealt with the psychological review of field agents. Her job was to ensure no one was horribly, horribly traumatized from dealing with that week's villainous psychopath before sending them out into the field again.

Dr Grace Fine straightened her glasses, her confidence unshaken. "I know this experiment might just seem like data collection for some 'frivolous research paper'- but I'm hoping that by understanding the dynamics of the successful teams, I could write a manual to improve team synergy in newer cadets and reduce field casualties. Perhaps you could offer the participating teams a reward of sorts? It works with my cats."

The bearded man gave a light hearted chuckle at the statement. But the doctor did argue a good point, after all, the VSSE was all about saving lives wasn't it? Why not their own? He ran a hand through his well trimmed beard thoughtfully. "Alright then, I'll have my three best teams competing in this social experiment of yours."

* * *

After being summoned into the head's office, the three seasoned agents gave each other curious looks, noting the lack of their younger partners at the meeting.

"Dr Fine, may I introduce: Agent Robert Baxter from the top senior team, Agent Wesley Lambert from the top special operations in the American division, and lastly Agent Giorgio Bruno from the top special operations team in the European division." Beamed the director with obvious pride.

The doctor shared a smile in knowing the bearded man had genuinely offered her his cream of the crop for the social experiment. "Now gentlemen, it's a pleasure to meet you all for my research. The winning team of the experiment wins what the Director mentioned as the 'Rio mission'. She noted a shift in expressions as soon as the word 'Rio' left her lips. _Sounds like the cats like their treat_. "The experiment is to give your respective partners unexplained silent treatment, the last person to converse with their partner wins the prize".

"…..That's it? Silent treatment?" asked Robert, skeptical at the simple parameters.

Dr Fine smiled. "If you wish to compete, you'll also have to wear a shoulder mounted camera and microphone of course. And no telling your partners, or someone else's partner about the experiment in any way."

"For those who would like to participate, you'll find your equipment in the armoury." Boomed the leader as he motioned to its general direction. "Good luck gentlemen, you are dismissed."

After a chorus of 'yes sir's and salutes the agents exited the office and made their way to the armoury.

"Walking a bit fast there, you nervous little guy?" teased Robert.

Giorgio snorted, not bothering to look at the taller agent to his right. "Nothing better to calm my nerves than a stay in Rio. At the beach. In a five star resort."

"Heh. Alan's been my best friend since before the VSSE, we're going to win this." Smiled Wesley, at Giorgio's left. "It's not yours just yet Mr Bruno."

"Yet. It will be when you two ass-clowns crack before I do". Replied Giorgio coolly.

Robert let out an indignant noise. "Please, Keith and I have been partnered for longer than either of you kids. Go play in your sandpits while I get the pasty bastard tanned."

Wesley laughed,"He only looks 'pale' when he's standing next to your sun-burnt ass." Giorgio snorted quietly in agreement.

The trio finally reached the armoury and equipped their inconspicuous surveillance equipment. Amidst all their trash talking and bragging, the psychologist began jotting notes in another room, and looked up to smile at three separate monitors which were linked to the agents' surveillance gear. As her screens sprung to life, so did her experiment.

* * *

 **Authors note:** So I've re-read my drafts and thus, the rating has been bumped down from an 'M' down to a 'T' for the mid- level violence and language. Hope you guys like it, and feel free to give any thoughts or constructive criticism!


	2. Mission Start

**Mission Start**

* * *

As soon as his gear was on, Wesley had headed to the training course in order to run laps. He ran for almost an hour, non-stop at his highest speeds. With his body burning with the heat of strenuous exercise, he made his way to the on base suite he shared with Alan while he vigorously pinched his already pink cheeks.

"Hey Wes, what was that meeting about?" Alan asked as he turned his head to his partner who had just entered the kitchen from the doorway.

Wesley gave a small smile as he stumbled forward, and made incoherent coughing noises in an feigned 'attempt' to speak.

"Oh wow buddy, never mind I asked." Alan said as he put a hand to his partner's forehead. "Crap! You're really burning up! And I haven't seen you this pink since you last asked a cute girl out." He grinned.

Resisting the urge to smack Alan on the side of his head, Wesley gave a sheepish nod.

"You just go to bed, buddy. I'm going to go training ok? Call my cell if you need anything."

Wesley smiled and gave another fake cough. _I should win an Oscar for managing to pull a sick-day on my best friend of all people._

* * *

"Robert! There you are! Geez, Keith has been looking for you all morning." Sighed an exasperated Christy Ryan. She had worked with both Robert and Keith in order to stop the launch of a nuclear satellite a few years back, and had become a good friend to the pair after the mission.

The infiltration specialist gave Agent Baxter a somewhat judgmental look. Her specialty may have been in finding things, but Robert had given her a challenge she didn't particularly care for in the morning.

"He has? Man, it's only been three hours. That man needs a hobby." Said the tanned agent as he scratched his head with an annoyed expression.

Christy raised an eyebrow, curious. "What's going on?"

"What's going on is I need a plan… Say, Christy you're good at sabotage."

* * *

"Giorgio! Gioooorgiooo!" The feathered-haired blonde called out in a sing-song tone. Evan walked out of the bathroom and peeked his head in the suite's kitchen. _Huh. Thought the guy would be back by n- hold it._ He thought as he spotted a piece of paper on the kitchen counter:

 **'To Bambino Evan,**

 **I needed to do some urgent shopping. Go play with your other little friends.**

 **-Con amore di Giorgio.'**

He furrowed his eyebrows, but smiled. He was going to whoop the other agent's ass for calling him a baby again. _For crying out loud, I'm 25._ The next time they had a spar he was _really_ going to get it. Evan pictured the most humiliating submission holds he could use on the older man. Perhaps forcing Giorgio to do the splits? But for now he decided to head to the gym for his usual training regime until his partner returned to base.

As he started raining light blows on the punching bag in the extensive VSSE gym room, he was greeted by Alan who started kicking the bag next to his. "Bonjour Alan! You alright? You look kinda high strung. And where's Wes?"

"He's sick man, and I mean really sick. Really quick as well. He seemed fine when he went to that morning meeting too…" frowned Alan.

Before Evan could respond with his sympathy, the duo spotted Robert jogging up to them.

"Hey bubs, why so partner-less?" asked the older agent.

"Wesley is sick in bed. And Giorgio…he….. he went out shopping". Evan answered lamely.

"Oh wow" Robert smiled in amusement. _Clever bastards. Well I have some tactics of my own._ After hearing Christy speak from his ear bud, he changed his tone to a more somber one, as per her instructions. "Do you know what Lambert is sick with exactly?"

"No… I thought it was just a fever. He was coughing so bad, I didn't want him to talk."

"Well that blows. You might want to take him to Dr Valentine if he isn't better by tomorrow or something. After all, you guys went to Astigos Island right? I heard that place has a really rare and nasty disease." The younger agents looked at Robert intensely, silently urging him to continue. _Gottcha._ "It's a pretty vicious one… it stays dormant for quite some time. And then- boom, out of nowhere. Full blown fever, and severe coughing. If it's not treated early, the respiratory system collapses suddenly." Christy had merely told Robert to regurgitate description of the symptoms Alan had listed with an added severe final consequence. "Oh, and before the respiratory collapse happens, there's an outbreak of anal sores." That was his own personal touch.

The other two agents cringed.

"Ah crap, that sounds almost exactly like it! Do you know the name of the disease?" Asked Alan with wide eyes, now more alarmed than ever and trying not to imagine Wesley with anal sores.

"Sorry bud, no clue. Apparently it's so rare they haven't even named it officially. Better get him to the infirmary. If it's not treated immediately, who knows what could happen." Robert said, lightly patting his own rear.

"Yeah I will, thanks!" The aviator glasses-wearing agent exclaimed, as he broke into a sprint while waving a rushed goodbye to the two blue agents.

Robert almost felt bad for the man. But then he remembered the prize he was after, and then he didn't feel bad at all. "Well I need to go prepare for a mission, and I'll definitely tell Keith to let him know about Wesley." He hinted to Evan with a nod.

The Frenchman nodded in return. "Yeah, I'll keep Giorgio in the loop too. See you around Robert."

The other agent left, with a shit-eating grin on his face, unbeknownst to Evan. Meanwhile, the freckled blonde called Giorgio on his phone. "…". Or at least tried to. He tried another five times before he gave up. Evan wasn't normally one to give up, but he'd try again in 15 minutes.

* * *

 **Zzzzzzzz zzzzzzz zzzzz**. Giorgio shot an irritated look at his phone that he was desperately _trying_ to ignore. He was killing time by looking for some collared shirts at a suit store. Not a complete waste of his time, as his last favourite collared shirt was ruined via a spectacular mission explosion. _Why is Evan being so needy today?_ He watched his phone stop buzzing, then start again after a short pause.

An older passer-by noticed the buzzing and chuckled in a snobbish tone, "Looks like someone isn't getting enough attention".

"No…no he isn't. And now I have to find a way to stop him going up my ass."" the Italian replied nonchalantly.

The nosy stranger choked on her own air in surprise, and awkwardly waddled away. Giorgio realized too late– that he may not have used that English expression correctly. His eyebrow twitched. "Dammit." Never mind the sodomy he had implied to a total stranger; his plan would fail if the brat decided to look for him in person too soon. The mustached agent carefully thought of way to deal with his partner and sent a message.

[I can't talk out loud right now… what's up?].

Evan replied in mere seconds, [We're worried about Wes. He got sick really fast. Rob says it could be a rare disease from Astigos!].

The brunette scoffed and rolled his eyes. Wesley playing sick was actually a good idea until Robert took wind of it. _I said you two ass-clowns would crack before I do. Now to take scheming old Robert out of the competition._ [I'll get a care basket for Wesley from both of us while I'm out shopping. While I'm looking for that, I need an urgent favour from you.]

[Good idea! What's the favour? :D ]

[I owe Robert for something, and I was thinking of surprising him and Keith with dinner tonight. I need you to get Keith to find out what his favourite Italian foods and desserts are. It'll be too obvious if either of us asked. It has to be Keith.] Giorgio smirked; he was such a nice guy. He would cook Robert a nice dinner as a consolation prize for not winning.

* * *

 _That's it? Pffft, too easy._ Evan thought as he sent his reply. [No problem! See you tonight.] The young agent looked up from his phone and saw Keith scanning the room near the gym room entrance. _Okay, I wasn't expecting it to be that easy._ "Keith! Hey!" he waved.

The older blonde unfurrowed his eyebrows and waved back to Evan as he approached his junior colleague. "Afternoon Evan- you haven't seen Robert anywhere have you? I can't believe I lost a guy wearing a bright, cyan blue jacket. Frankly I'm ashamed of myself." He said in a particularly British manner, as his native tone shone through his usual radio accent.

Evan snorted. "I think your 'blue' is getting a little senile. Guy went out looking for you just then to tell you that Wes is pretty sick."

"What? That can't be right. I haven't heard from the man since he went to that meeting in the morning." Keith stated with a raised eyebrow. After Evan explained Wesley's situation to him, he told him about the favour Giorgio wanted.

"Will do. As soon as I find the bloody bastard." Smiled Keith.

"I saw him heading down hallway 3C. Maybe he's going to the library?"

"Cheers. I'll see you at dinner time" he winked as he headed out.

Meanwhile, Robert strolled past the headquarters library and thought of how to deal with Giorgio. _Like hell I'm going to let you avoid the battlefield_ he thought. He reached towards his ear bud and clicked a button. "Come in Christy."

"Ryan here, what do you need?"

"Seems like Giorgio thinks he can wait this competition out in a mall." he scoffed.

"I'll falsify some data from the armoury, and recall him immediately to finish some 'urgent paperwork he forgot'" she replied.

Robert's serious expression turned into a smile. "Getting him to come back to base to deal with some bureaucracy? That's so...evil. I love it."

"I aim to please."

As Robert walked around a corner, he flinched as he saw Keith. All his previous smugness was gone. As the two made eye contact he froze like a deer in the headlights.

"Robert! Bloody hell, man I've been looking for you everywh-" Roberts sneakers made a screeching noise on the flooring as he bolted back around the corner. "HEY COME BACK!"

Keith broke out into a sprint after the other agent, and the chase was on.

* * *

 **Author's note:** And now the action starts! Do let me know if the story is confusing to follow in any way. There is an awful lot of sabotaging going on after all...


End file.
